Is more than I could have possibly prepared myself for. It is more work, more worry, more joy and so much more love than I thought in my wildest dreams.
Our little man, Watson Kirby Rusk, was born just over two weeks ago at a whopping 10lbs 7oz, he is quite the big boy. We spent our first three days in the hospital, getting to know each other, and just trying to recover from the 18 laborfest that was to be his first mark on this world. In the end he came out looking beautiful and both his and his mom are healthy, mission #1 accomplished.
Once home the real story starts. No one tells you, but even if they did you would not believe, the amount of worry that goes into those first few days. Is he too hot, why is he breathing like that, is he eating enough, it’s enough to make you go mad. One night in particular felt like a bad trip with my wife and I having a joint emotional meltdown as we fretted over how little he was eating. At that point there was no consoling us, he was going to wither away in his sleep and die, that’s it! Well, the next day, we visit the lactation consultant and not only is he getting enough he has been putting on weight ahead of the average for a newborn. Not to say that information has made all of our fears go away, but it is something to get us through those nights when those fears try and take hold.
It has not been all worry though, it has also been the deepest joy imaginable. It’s amazing what can now make me face light up. After we first got him home, he went almost two days without making business (taking a poo). As the hours ticked by without a movement the worry built up. Finally he let loose! I was so proud. Yeah that’s right, my kid crapped all over himself and I was proud. Being a new dad is a crazy thing.
Every day that goes by he is a bit more alert, a bit more in control of his movements. Being able to watch this happen is awesome. I had no idea my entire world could become so focused, but it has, on my son.